Finding My Mom Style

I’ve been pregnant for what seems like three years, since 2018! So I feel like I havent been able to explore and express my style since before then. I havent really shopped for myself because life is hectic. When Im pregnant theres really no point in shopping because everything makes you look, well, pregnant.

After I had Luke in 2019 I went through depression. I remember that after we came home from the NICU I would stare at myself in the mirror and wouldn’t recognize the person that was starring back at me. I had tremendous guilt and I didn’t feel like I deserved to feel good and my appearance sometimes gave that away. As I started to feel better and began to feel more like myself I got pregnant again in 2020… So that was that. After this pregnancy I’ve been working very hard to keep my depression at a manageable state, my anxiety at bay, and I’m making more of an effort to help myself feel better and thus looking better.

Working on my inner self

The way I work on my inner self is by focusing on my thoughts, spirit, and emotions. My head is always running with worry, anxiety, guilt and self doubt. Yes that’s a lot but I’m being honest on my mental health struggles. I can pinpoint the signs of when I’m going into a depressive episode pretty quickly, but the question is always whether I care to do anything about it. As a therapist I know that self care and coping skills will help manage depression. I know that it won't take it away but I want to at least manage it. So to work on my inner self I read daily devotionals, I pray, I listen to a lot of music, I write, I spend time trying to inspire others in my position by working on my NICU Family page, I talk to my main support which is my husband and sister, and I go to the gym and spend time with my other sister. These things help me feel good about myself, they help me put effort on my appearance, be a better mom, and be a better wife.

Has my sense of fashion gone down the drain?

Now that I’ve gotten myself to a good state and lost some of that pregnancy weight I feel ready to start working on my wardrobe. As I started to look at Pinterest, fashion accounts, and trying to shop I realized my sense of fashion has gone down the drain. First of all, why do I only see half shirts or huge t-shirts? Either my pansa sticks out or I look like a whale swimming in a t-shirt. Wearing skinny jeans is no longer in and as we all know the side part is gone. Okay can you tell I’ve spent too much time on tik-tok? Anyways, I started to ask myself what’s my expressive style? There are a few things I made a list of.

In order to buy an item it must check off certain requirements. Number one, it must be comfortable. Number two, I should feel confident. Number three, it needs to go with at least three different outfits. Number four, it must be breastfeeding friendly. Number five it must actually fit me. After making this list I started to research how I can rebuild my wardrobe and I came across capsules. I may be a little late on this but I had no idea they existed. A capsule is a certain number of clothing items that you can wear and create many looks from and still be fashionable. So I decided to try and build one for myself. Some of these items I already had and others I bought.

Building my postpartum wardrobe capsule

I decided to start off with pants. Right now pants are the most difficult for me to find since I’m still not at my normal size and I don't want to buy pants that I will only wear for a short time. So I looked into mom jeans with straight leg and boyfriend jeans. So I have a pair of dark wash skinny jeans, a boyfriend jean, high waisted paper bag pants, and cream mom jeans, oh and of course at least one pair of leggings. These bottoms can be dressed up or dressed down and can be worn throughout the entire year.

Next I moved on to tops. This was hard because I tend to buy tops that are very memorable, not basic types of tops so it’s difficult to reware and style differently. I tried to stick with basic colors and maybe one print. I have a white button down shirt, a loose fitting black t-shirt, a tight fitting t-shirt, a white tank, a light blue button down, and a pink long sleeve. These were simple that go with all of the pants above.

Then I moved on to dresses. It was difficult to find dresses that can be worn three different ways. Maybe add a jacket, switch the heel for sandals or sneakers, but it’s mostly a one outfit kind of deal. I decided to go with one dress and a jumpsuit. For jackets I have a fitted blazer, a denim jacket, and a long cardigan.

Now for shoes, that was simple I have a good amount, but I only really wear a handful of them. So as long as I have my workout sneakers, white sneakers, chuck taylors, loafers, cognac booties, and strappy sandals. But I couldn't stop there and I did buy a snake skin pair of booties, but they were ten dollars! For my bags and purses well I can't variate from my diaper bags because I have two, but if for some reason I do go somewhere without my kids I will stick to my coach crossbody purse. Lastly my jewlery will be simple with layered necklaces. No earrings or bracelets because of masks and kids. So here are some outfits I put together! Tell me what you think and which one is your favorite.

Wardrobe Capsule: 24 Items

5 Pants

6 Tops

1 Dress

1 Jumper

3 Layers/ Jackets

6 Pairs of Shoes

1 Bag

1 Set of Layered Necklaces